Sucker for Romantic comedies

Falling in love .. over and over and over again .. each time with a different line .. each time sounding to you a little cheesy and cliche but it makes my heart skip a beat. Goose pimples come crawling up and I go sinking into my bed .. I've never felt more cozy.
I can watch a movie like a million times ..right from start ..... just to come to that one part that reassures my faith in love... where the struggle ..the innocence.. the cowardliness ..the desperation.. breaks into something so bold and empowering.. this hope is what keeps me alive. Love.. what a feeling.. its good that they've given it a name coz now I can define what I feel.. I know I have that disease coz I know I suffer from it. It makes me happy .. it makes me lose myself completely to someone who I hope deserves it.. :p
I cant help but relate or relive my life stories through these movies .. and as hopeless as it may sound, I try to find my answers to relationships through them. Now you may think its only a movie and I think so too but it lets me live in this world which is so wonderful.
I know Life is hard ..and I know people are not always nice ... and I know you think I am a complete idiot but this is how I plan to live it .. blindfolded and happy.

P.S. Dont try and wake me up..I'm having a beautiful dream.

Signed,
Cinderella

Seven Deadly Sins

Wrath is consuming my time
Greed not letting me stop mine
Sloth for I shamelessly eat it
Pride coz I have to beat it
Lust that I've overcome
Envy is making me a bum
Gluttony hence all that fat

Ahh been there done that. Nexxttt.

P.S Stay away ... this one bites.

Wake Up Sunshine

He who rises and falls
reaches a new level zero
For the heights were high
and the lows got dimmer

Falling down to earth
cutting through the clouds
no plan A .. no plan B
just the end in sight

He who trusts one
bears the brunt with tears
for no one is no one's
and its only you and your fears

Crippled on the ground
wrapped up with pain
memories so hard to erase
with all the fuzzy lanes.

He who lets down his defenses
not a smart thing to do I say
coz there will be one such foe
who'll take the chance any day

So know yourself and love yourself
coz you live just once
listen to yourself ..and listen deep
give your voice a turn.

They teach us to be kind, they teach us to love
then where does it all go with time
Don't forget to be human, give if you wish..
but in the end its only I,me and mine.

The one who falls, will rise one day
for pain is all said and done
He'll know that trust has no rewards
its like gambling to live and burn.

Signed
Hurt poet

Mee Janhavi Parab boltay!

Truth, Where is the truth? Who'll tell me the truth ? Did the leaders really write history? Or was it so craftily altered that the truth passed away with the martyrs. A classic example, Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi, man of principles, a great leader, father of the nation ..now that's what the teacher told me. I recently uploaded some pictures on Facebook of Mani Bhavan, where Gandhiji resided everytime he visited Mumbai. The feeling of being a proud Indian had surfaced each time I scanned through the portraits and letters signed M K Gandhi. The experience felt real and touching. I really thought that people would share the same feeling, but their remarks were astonishing. People hate him, they really do hate him... now where did all this arise. So much animosity towards a hero. Was their opinion based on facts... did they really know what they were talking about.. did I miss a lecture in my history class where all this was covered! I was not ready to get dis-heartened yet, I wasn't going down without validating my beliefs.

And then my friend Google and I went on a trip ... trip down the history lane. Going through videos(by Gopal Godse himself), Nathuram Godge's speech at trial, FIR reports, blogs, surveys, articles, movies.. for almost a week. I watched "Me Nathuram Godse Boltoy" a Marathi play which shows his point of view as to why he killed Gandhiji. You end up believing him in the end but I was still unsure to let go of my paragons.

This whole exercise was to have an opinion about the leader, to take a stand. Sadly, the information seemed too ambiguous to me. Did Gandhiji say "Hai Ram" while he was dying .. or was it "ohhh"(cry of pain) or as the FIR Report says it was "Ram Ram" or the book says "Hai Ra..Hai Ra". History couldn't even get that right. Did Gandhiji want partition, the movie says he was reluctant but people say he was pro-partition!! Did anyone see us all living as ONE country if the partition didn't happen..Hindu- Muslim bhai bhai. Really? Why couldn't we just give the man a break and consider the circumstances and the pressure he was facing.. Poor old man. On the other hand the fight about Non-violence...what is that? Now according to Martin Luther King,Jr and few others.. it worked. But wouldn't the British mind killing Indians for another 100 years, if it weren't for the World War II. So what ..now we thank Hitler. Is he our real hero? And then there is the Khilafat movement, the 55 crores, the support for Muslims, hurting hindu sentiments by calling Swami Shraddananda's muslim killer, a patriot, making Nehru the PM and trillion other things that are repeatedly remarked.

Its breaking my heart to face new facts every single day, and bit by bit.. I realize that the truth has been altered, so I decided to stop my fanatic search. So many people..so many opinions .. so much aggression and for what.. he is dead now. He didn't ask to be on the notes or as road names.. Please stop swearing at him ... he did die for the country you know..he made sacrifices ..they all did. He had the power, he lead the people .. Dandi march, boycott, strikes an then people died for the freedom struggle..for the country ..for us ..must be something he did right.

He was only human, so let him rest in peace. Nathuram Godse saheb had an opinion, I truly respect it .. but you weren't there.. you didn't face it, you didn't feel it, you didn't fight for it. Sit at home, watch TV and have a sound sleep. I stand to fail ..to have an opinion. I don't want to have one. So stop jumping at me and telling me what to believe. I believe in Truth and it doesn't look like its out there.

This topic is not open for any comments about Gandhiji. Enough is enough.

His Intelligence Personified

Hi .... hi ... meet him..this is ____.. he has a MBA degree in General Management from the University of Denver, Colorado, a Master of Science degree in Computer Science from George Mason University, Fairfax, Virginia, and a Bachelor of Engineering degree in Computer Science and Engineering from the University of Mysore, India. And also has a Juris doctorate degree. He speaks more than 5 languages and is currently learning the third font of Japanese.. loves to play golf and has traveled around the world and is settled in US.. Meet her ... she can drive. And I sink into my seat. I have never been nervous when it comes to meetings coz I usually know what people wanna hear. But this was different. There was no common level in between to strike up a conversation, no common ground except for the fact that he is a maharashtrian.

I have heard so much about him but truth be told he didn't know anything about me .. but there was nothing to know. And the MOM is as follows:-
One: free time is not sleeping time and watching TV time. Its reading, learning, writing, exploring.
Two: love a sport or something that is physical.
Three: No carbs , no sugar, and exercise
Four: Japanese think too much and try to put themselves in others shoes first ..they do everything to the extreme.. even porn
Five: Activate your taste buds
Six: Travel as much as you can coz the airline company is soon gonna start caring about losing money
Seven: Whatever people say, Art Of Living course works.
Eight: The french serve good food.
Nine: Indian roads can have huge stones placed right in middle of the road so watch while you drive
Ten: If the food taste good, chances are its unhealthy

And a nice chit chat conversation with him, my boss and his wife. He mentioned about a book. A book that made him cry and later we went to a store near by and he insisted to buy me that book. I was excited at the same time it was weird to take something from someone you've met for the first time. But he didn't seem new at all. I told him if he wanted to buy me that book, he has to sign it. And he did.
I know you're wondering which book it was and I wont be selfish to keep the name to myself. Its called A Fine Balance by Rohinton Mistry. I met a person who was kind, who didnt make me feel like this big owing to his background. He made me wanna become somebody. All in all a great day

A lil smarter than yesterday
Me

Curiosity killed my cat

shhh no one is suppose to know ... please dont discuss this with anyone and there it goes round and round until the person herself is confronted of her own secret .... being asked.. I heard something, is it true? Why are people so incapable of keeping a secret. Agreed you cant keep it to yourself coz your stomach aches .. and you told your best friend who also has a boyfriend..who she apparently cant hide anything from, even at the cost of your 'secret'. So only two of them know whew! But the boyfriend has a best friend who is also friends with the only girl who is NOT suppose to know. So, what did you learn children? Nothing .. Dont go home ... she is right now waiting at your doorstep and dont mistake what's in her hand for a garland.
Every single person on this revolving planet has a secret... tina bina ..reena meena seema.. rinky chinky ..everyone. The funny thing about this concept is ... while people are busy trying to hide something ... they dont mind poking their noses in someone elses life. Why else would you think people would be remotely interested in watching 'The Moment Of Truth' or if I can rightly say the moment you're stripped down.. When I watched this series with awe and disgust .. I thought to myself would any indian ...any sane indian do something like this for money. Indians are so controversial, diplomatic, introvert and so used to doing things behind the scenes that no one would ever volunteer for such an obnoxious serial. And bang there we have 'sach ka samna'. God bless their souls coz money is a waste if you lose your peeps. And whoever said money is everything needs to do a reality check.
Circling back to the point where we started this vicious circle ..Gossip is heaven .... I gossip .. didn't come across anyone who doesn't. But is there anything such as healthy gossip ... or harmless secret. .. you're putting yourself off da hook if you think so. The truth remains we want to know .. we love to know ... we are bothered .. we are curious human beings .. and this is exactly what killed my cat.

Put a ring on it

Talking about our boys II men.. not a boy not yet a man. lol... its funny how we girls can discuss boys endlessly while they are busy in some parallel universe talking about cars or cricket for that matter. News flash: Girl and girl and girl makes a helluva conversation about boys. Eaves dropping into a slumber party: you'll often hear this.. he is not ready yet..he says he needs time to think it over...he needs to first stand on his feet ..he loves me like crazy but he cant go against his parents...yada yada yada. yap yap yap. And we girls lose sleep over it. Though I don't think anyone should go against their parents but come on... take a step back and look at all this.
This is what we think of all this ...I cant expect him to be ready .. we are of the same age you know..and girls mature faster (atleast we girls think so)..if he needs time, I say he'll come around .. he needs to be independent ..aww how mature.. he loves me * 10(exaggeration) .. he is a homely boy. Ya rite ...homely my foot..and my favourite .. "I dont know" ... can we talk about this later.

So what factor decides if he is just that into you?

However cliche this would sound ...if you love them set them free if they come back kick them and keep them.

Happy

I am a happy person... I don't have to now build a world around me to make it seem happy. I change things .. I control my mind .. I love myself ... and I feel good ... not exactly the way I look right now .. coz it needs a lotta work plus I am 2 kilos overweight... Things don't need to fall in place anymore ... though few things already have. I am a happy person, I smile.. and the hazy glass just gets clearer and clearer. The happy bug has bit me really hard.

So I made a list of Happy thoughts (Happiness quotient set at equal level for all):-

1). Doggy .... a big , huge, furry dog ... who is absolutely out of hand.

2). Dancing ... shaking every inch of my body and sleeping with body parts aching.. reminding me I still have them intact.

3). Loving ...

4). Blogging... even though I have crappy things to write about

5). Friends ... my close peeps ... who know me, get me and love me

6). My green room ... the memories I have with it ..

7). Madhuri... I get goose bumps or rather every tinkly feeling ..when I watch her.

8). Animals .. all of them except snakes,lizards,bats and insects.

9). That pair of jeans ... that fits me amazingly

10). Talking to my parents and my brother... who are very far right now

11). My nephew ahaan

12). Greenery ... a path with trees on either side ..leading to a fountain ... birds and people

13). Mornings .. I'm a morning person

14). Saturdays... holiday the next day too.

15). Pictures of me ... cant help it .I was deprived of them from childhood.

16). Garfield

Woah .. not done with the list yet ... will probably list it out in my head ...

Have a happy day... its not unrealistic .. you really can be happy for a whole day and days to come ... its all about how you want it to be..

Signed,

Merry me

Nothing I do can make it right

Shit happens... they love you and then they hate you ... strictly in this order. So what changes in this period...you loved them and then you left them.. thats what changes. You deserve it .. you're aware of it and you very well know if you wanna stay friends then you're just rubbing it in. So STOP. If you cant deal with people hating you .. stop making them. Why the hell am I talking like its some random third person .. its ME. My urge to make people like me and keep everyone happy backfired. ... BIG time. So currently just shutting up and minding my own business.~~~tralalalala~~~ -> nice ..who me ? rubbish.

Da Dark cloud just passes by..

I know I know it was a month ago ... some random Sunday, when I was feeling low and depressed and I blogged about the non-happenings of my life. But since I was away ... I was off doing things .. feeling things ... loving things ...and hating them.

I wanted to write a blog about how I moved into this magnificent three bedroom house and how I love the huge hall and the huge balcony and my cool room ..all of it for not a penny extra. It was a freaking steal .. I really feel bad for the owner. He is this maharashtrian guy from pune ... I tell you ..we maharashtrians are service class people. We just cant think business.

Then I thought of writing about how my previous owner was totally unfair to us and was acting like a total bitch..so a whole week was spent ..taking legal advice from lawyers. Did you know that a 50 rupees stamp paper holds no good. Actually none of the stamp papers hold any good .. since the 40000 worth of transaction is gonna take 4 years to settle anyway. And trust me lawyers don't come cheap. Finally I handled this situation... boy ..if I'd let my roommate talk to the landlady all you could hear is $!@#$*&%..and you wish you had a hearing problem.

Weird things have been happening around me. Some I don't understand ... some I understand but I'm acting dumb and some are just there... right in my face..jolting me back to reality. So.. how hard do you need to be pinched to make you SEE. ... hard, really really hard. Lets just say there is this dark cloud that got me wet .. totally drenched ... and then the next minute there was not a single drop of water .. huh.. no analogies .. this actually happened. :) You don't know if you should be happy that the dark cloud has passed by ..or felt foolish that you didn't wait for the rain to stop. Coming to bigger crisis in my life ..

So .. then thought of writing about stuff that I thought would never happen to me. It didn't... but it happened to her. A very emotional period I say .. one of things that made me realise that the world around me is not perfect. The happy faces you see everyday have so much history ... You would never know ..and be glad you don't. I wish I knew how she felt .. things she thought .. things she wanted to say but she didn't. I have never been so broken as I was that day.

I thought of blogging about losing a dear friend .. but trust me its not worth it. I would have thought it was but I'm just too angry and confused right now. I just don't get it .. but I know I am not wrong .. I'm just possessive. :) Well ... then I thought I would at least write an useless entry just for the heck of it .. but I can proudly say "You see.. I'm on call.. I don't have much time". I am loving it .. the responsibility .. the expectations.. the time lines ..basically da work.

Today I tripped .. missed a step and hit badly.. dropped the God's prasad on the floor. It was all down .. was it a sign that things I asked for ..aren't gonna happen .. or was it like a punishment for my sins.. or may be a reminder to wake up and smell the heat ... the world is no more a safe place and I don't think it ever was... it's just waiting to rip you off.

p.s. loving the weather here .... havent switched ON the fan since three days. Well, I really wish I had something to blog about.

Not so happening,

me

Manic Sunday

Its happens each time ... every time I think I want to just chill out and sit at home on a Sunday... the evening just takes all the fun outta me. I get grumpy and emotional and I don't know ... Brainsick. People get the Monday blues ... but trust me I am more than happy to be at work on Mondays. Well not nowadays ..coz I don't have much to do. But still nothing can beat da manic Sunday. I don't even know why people hate Monday mornings ... its the Sunday evenings that are more distressing.

I scanned through my phonebook ... and thought of all the possible friends I could call and share my gloominess with .. I called her .. she sleeps at 10 and she switches off her phone even on her own birthday so chances are .. she doesn't care.. then I called him .. he was out. He hates it when I call her before him, coz it clearly gives away the hierarchy .. and trust me this whole non-availability.. happens every Sunday. Its like everyone knows how to handle this dreadful day except me.

Oh look what time it is ... its time to catch some Z's.. ha finally .. It'd be dawn tomorrow and I'll probably be blogging about 'Monday Blues'. in case I don't .. then I made it through.

p.s. I shall leave you to savour a song from Annie - a musical. It's beautiful.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yop62wQH498&feature=related

Tomorrow

When I'm stuck with a day
That's gray,
And lonely,
I just stick out my chin
And grin,
And say,
Oh

The sun'll come out
Tomorrow
So ya gotta hang on
'Til tomorrow
Come what may

Tomorrow
Tomorrow
I love ya
Tomorrow

You're only
A day away

Is Skater Boy really the Hero..

He was a skater boy, she said see ya later boy
he wasn't good enough for her
now he's a super star
slammin on his guitar
does your pretty face see what he's worth?

For some twisted reason I relate to this song. Its about this guy fallen head over heels for this bonnie lass and she being this self obsessed bitch thinks he is a loser... And years later .. he makes it big and she is the one in the crowd..looking at him ..up there.. thinking to herself ... if only.....! It somehow reminds me of all the guys I have jilted and scorned .. I know they may be over it by now... busy making something of themselves and I wish them luck.. Now I dont want to sound like a 'Diva' but I seriously wish I knew another way to make peace with them. But I guess there is no sweeter way .. now is there?

The thing that I believe .. makes me wiser now is that ..you can love who you want .... however the person may be .. you love them for them. Any rockstar would just not do it... so stick to him...stand by him .. coz he makes you happy.. the guys who you dumped or dumped you ... there is a reason they are not a part of your life. Dont be afraid to love .. if not him there will be another ... but still .. give it your all!

p.s. there is always an option. ... (though this is not the moral of the story.)

Conclusion: I don't blame the cold hearted bitch....how could she foresee.. that the lousy skater boy would in future ..be so successful!!! Now wouldnt she be stupid enough to marry a loser whom she doesnt love ... She might as well marry the boring software engineer .. who she loves so deeply..be knocked up and sit at home watching the rockstar on tv and say .. "we used to go out!"

Here to stay

Well ... this inactivity in my blog nearly convinced me that it is one of those times that people discontinue to write their blogs due to lack of time.. or any unintentional circumstances that crop up.. or may be they are just over the fact that they need to even maintain anything like this to record the happenings of their lives. But I'm going nowhere ... 

   

Its MY Day ... however narcissistic I sound.

    You're right ...My blog is not gonna write itself so here I am ..taking time out of my so called busy but happening life to write about an event which supposedly made me a lil wiser. I turned 23 a week ago.. how should I put it .. a year away from being excused of my juvenile behaviour ..or a year closer to be all calm and composed.. talk only when required yada yada yada. I  detest it. I swear both my maushi's called on my birthday and the first thing they asked was ...how old are you ... we have to start looking for you now. Dude .. I am only 23  .. I mean I remember being 16 and looking up to the 20 something year olds and thinking .. man when will get there. Here I am now .. alive and kicking but not too happy about the number 23. I feel like my body is getting old and my mind is still not ready to accept that I can actually get married and have kids by now. God .. goose pimples goose pimples .... stopping right now. 

    Besides the state of my marriageability .. I also had a lotta fun that day. My birthday doesn't start at 12.00 midnight ..for me it starts at 8 p.m. the previous day when I am all excited about the big day .. and as tradition I clean my hall and my room coz it still reminds me of the time when I was warned about 20 friends coming home to wish me and my room being a total mess. The dress ..accessories .. plans .its all done in advance.. as time approaches midnight ..my hearts starts beating faster ..as though the love of my life is gonna come knocking at my door or instead a puppy is gonna be waiting at my door step with a little bow tied to its head .. all in all I'm just too excited. Things just need to be perfect.

    Though I am not a very gift person (huh liar..) but I totally enjoy the surprise ones. Either they get me what I asked for .which saves me the trouble of spending on something I really need.. or its a good surprise gift. One thing about me is I would love if someone wrote me a poem .. or made a card .. you know like dedicate hours just to make me something special. It doesn't take pricy gifts to make me happy .. but I am not denying the fact that I still would gladly accept bling blings..

    So .. it was night and calls calls calls .. from people who wouldn't even stay awake for their own birthday .. from people who matched American timings just to call me .. and from people who I thought went underground and dug their way up just to say they care.. You have no clue how much pressure that puts on me . to remember their birthdays. I hate it when I don't make efforts to be in touch with people and I hate it more when I aint doing anything about it either. 

    The day was spent exactly how I wanted it to be. I wore my dress .. showed it off and got all the attention I needed ..not too much .not too less. Hell the party went on for days .. went pubbing.. driving .. and feels like my life is just picking up. God knows how many times I'll use that phrase.. coz every time I feel I'm enjoying too much .. I tell my self to shut up and sit at home.

    But still ... Happy Birthday to me.. a year older but not hitting maturity. Lets just say ... I'm not quite there yet.

 

I've got love that is impossible

It happened to me ... I cant believe it happened to me .... Oh baby ..you came ..you came for me. I thought I had lost you ..I have been longing for this moment for so long ...things like these don't happen to me so often. And you are here ...I cant believe you are here .. for all the time apart.. I guess I deserve to be happy now and I am. Oh man .. I wanna hold you so tightly and never let you go ... you're mine .. and I wont ever let you outta ma sight again. Thank you .. thank you my friend for doing this .. .. a million thanks .. a trillion ..a zillion ..... thanks ... topping the roof ..jumping away .. thanks .. .. I can hear the strums ring tone in my head again tanananatanananang.. oh wait I can hear it on my Apple IPhone..!!!!

Thanks Mo.

:)

Pumping goodness back in the loop again!

Woke up this morning .... 

Heard my mother saying something ... 

Like disaster in the house ..since

The cook didn't come today and

next second I was running ... 

for the bus that didn't stop for me

took the other I saw coming .. 

and gave up ma seat for the lady..

got down somewhere in between 

did something I could never do ... 

took ANOTHER bus to destination....

I guess I'm in the groove

Helped a blind lady ... 

to find her seat next to me..

Walking down the road and ..

blaxo came running ... 

he's ma famished white dog I keep feeding..

Looked out for the open tea shop ...

Parle G was a saviour ..

All's well again

World is happy again .....

I thought SHE was up there ...

But I know SHE is in here.

Who am I ... I am the friendly neighbourhood freaky haired angelic dame.

p.s. For all the MCP's... God can be a SHE ... so stop wondering who I am referring to!

I know where she is coming from!

She is this famous blog writer with like 35000 hits ...who recently wrote a book ..hopefully a successful one. I happen to read it.. better yet.. happen to start and end reading as fast as possible. I would not wanna spill names coz that is not the purpose of this blog. The thing is ... while I was reading the book .. it was a big never ending story about her and her ventures with all possible guys .. I admired her to let her life out in the open like that ..but there are details that people don't need to know..especially your parents ..your family ..your X-boyfriends and yeah off course your future ones.. It was too much of a chick book ... and way too girly for me.

Anyway the point being ... the blog was such a rip off from "The Sex and the City" ... I mean I have watched whole 7 seasons of this enlightening serial ...and only wished I could be like Carrie Bradshaw ...getting invites for parties..free lancing ..shoes..clothes..accessories ..did I mention shoes.. Hell I even know someone who lives in new york .. is a writer and lives in an apartment she cant afford ..and I thought the closest I'll come to being like her is writing blogs .. I'm just feeling bad that someone thought of it before I did ...damn you twenty plus something older girls ... I wish I could start bloggin a lil earlier. I hope I have better shoes sense than her.. ok ffine curly hair will also do!!

Not so famous Blog Writer

Oh my sweet long lost Mango

The season has begun. The time to let go of all your table manners and dig into that sweet sweet mango and taste the most hyped at the same time awaited fruit. I pity the ones who don't like it and trust me I recently got to know a lotta them .. but really ..to me this is not just a fruit. May be it is the long period you need to wait for it .. or may be it is just the hype around which I've been born and brought up .. but it doesn't matter coz I absolutely love it. I am a giver .. atleast I claim to be one .. but offering to have my mango .. hmmm .. now that's new! Its here and I'm taking total advantage of that. My mommy's gonna store it .. until December .. but the taste of the real fruit its priceless.

P.S. Mango if you're reading this .... I'm strictly referring to the fruit only.

Mango Lover....(not you Mr.Mangirish (mango))

The Simple Life ...pursuing sisterhood

    Getting ready for office .. making sure my clothes match and stuffing the jewellery and make up in my bag ..hoping I would still manage to catch the 7.40 BMTC bus. My high heels make it hard for me to run .. but I manage. Ah .. there it comes and a sigh of relief. A crowded journey till my stop .. and on the way a nun boards the bus. She smiles at the lady conductor . She seems like a regular traveller.
    I try to look closer and deeper. I think of all the things that must have led her to take such a vow to commit to God. How can they ask her to love but not fall in love? May be you need to be above all the seven deadly sins .. but isnt that what makes us humans! Getting outta the chain of thoughts I looked at her again.. she looked middle aged . so may be she was a widow .. or divorced .. failed love may be or just the 'calling' to serve God. She was kind and simple. She was wearing a brown sari with a crucifix necklace and thats it. 

    Now this is where I get self obsessed and think of myself. I wonder .. what if I were to become a nun. My first thought was not if I could help other people .. it was .. would I wear that brown sari with just a chain and simple shoes .. for the rest of my life! Will I be able to let go of all my luxuries and lead a religious life. The very fact I didnt think of serving people first .. shows how I can never become a nun. But even if I did .. I surely try to help people in my own sort of way .. I couldnt think of living a life with mere basics and chastity. Sisterhood is fine ... but the simple life.. now thats just too Paris hilton for me.

Not so simple
Me.

Baby Ballroom

I love dancing ...all forms of it .. from classical to hip hop hoochee mama..there is so much you can do with it .. and I would like to believe I am blessed with the talent to dance. I dance when I'm happy and I dance when I feel I'm putting on weight.. Or probably just dance. You don't need reasons to dance you can feel it ...enjoy it and love it.. and love yourself doing it. Well hooked on to the idiot box I watched Baby Ballroom. And as it clearly says .. the show has ten year old kids dancing so well ..doing the tango or the ballroom dancing. At first glance they looked like two mature people swaying and dancing to the beats. The dedication and love they have for dancing was evident. The maturity on their faces bedazzled me totally. I wanted to be there and have someone who would lead me on the floor. If only I wasn't so challenged with my vocabulary I would have expressed it so much better. All I can think of is .. It was just so beautiful and graceful and and ... (I'm speechless).

Not so Good Friday ... on a Good Friday Holiday!

Today is a holiday ..Oh Jesus.. ... The only calls I get are from the phone company... mocking me over my STD calls .. the only messages I get are from da bank, advertising their new offers or from the plane ticketing service or the credit card company ..and I wonder..is there anyone who thinks its worth calling me and letting me know that I'm remembered. I guess I deserve this for all the times I just didn't try too hard to keep in touch. And the people I love are just too far away and in order to keep in touch ... you need to drill a hole in your pocket. Well there is nothing much to do around here at home. And I just realized I hate lazing around and also ..sleeping is such a waste of time.. I have been talking to my TV and I freaked myself out by calling my computer 'My Baby' .. I'm nurturing it with loading the latest antivirus ..which took freaking two hours for the whole process. Man if computers are so demanding ... I don't think I am ready to have more people around !!!

So who's the bad guy then ...

Some women like men who are nice, sweet, emotional and completely in love with them...some of them like men who are strong emotionless, assertive and rational .. While the nice ones are the jealous, twinkled eyed, space hogger, poetry writers.. the latter category seems more exciting and questionable. These are the kind of guys who don't get jealous or infact don't feel anything at all. Now these types don't care much about where you go, who you meet coz they say they trust you completely. They don't care if you've waxed or have tried so hard to look good coz it doesn't matter. They don't flood you with gifts or write poems or put any thought into making any occasion special..you know like birthdays, anniversaries, new years etc etc.... . Now all this sounds so terrible but the truth is they are not so bad. It all starts out good .. the stubbornness is a turn on ..the assertiveness is sooo manly and the little extra things they do .. rock your world. Oh today he went out of his way to do this ..and he thought of me while doing that . oh so sweet. Are these kinda guys for real ? Trust me they surely are!!! Is it them or is it us women. Have we made them what they are? What if the guy is an 8 on 10 and he just loses out on emotions..it that acceptable ? What do we really want ...A man with a heart or a man with a head! Sorry ladies ... you cant have the cake and eat it too .. I still don't understand the proverb but I guess it just fits..

p.s. I dont get men !!!! Sue me if I claim otherwise.

Confused Lady

So what really is good for me ...

When people say 'Good for you' ...Does is really mean any good? Or are those the three magic words that make you shut up. Its so annoying ... I hate it when he says that to me !!!

Pissed off
Me

Anoop who!

Anoop dawg ..like randy says it ..is one of the finalist in American Idol. He wasn't doing too good until this week he was simply out of the world. He sang 'You were always on my mind' by Elvis Presly and the choice of song just turned things around for him. ... Well isnt it amazing to see an Indian up there. Our indian 'Kem cho' guy went from zero to hero .. as simon quotes. The song really touched me somewhere deep. He really made my day yesterday. I wish the people in america would vote for him .... All the best to him.

P.S. I usually dont like thick eyebrowed guys .. but I guess Anoop dawg also turned that around for me.

Loads of Love,
An Indian Bathroom Singer

What we call... The Man's Game

I was switching channels at lighting speed .. trying to skip the usual drama on TV and I am glad I stopped at ESPN to see the score of an ongoing cricket match .. which looked like just another set up field but I noticed there were women. It was India vs Aus ICC Women World Cup super six at Sydney Oval. I had missed India's side of batting but I still wasn't complaining coz they made 234/5. Well Aussies have a reputation to maintain in cricket or rather men's cricket coz here our Indian chicks were ripping them apart. It was nothing different than a usual cricket game ..the same old screaming, rejoicing and giving high tens after a wicket ..scratching the crotch, weird faces during bowling, same dude gogs and white striped faces, the same old 'caaaaaaattttttttcccccchhhhh ittttt'..and jumping around to grab balls ...I mean the ball. It felt so great that I got goose pimples every time she bowled and gave that killer stare to da bats-woman telepathically saying "I'll get you next time bitch" and turned away. Even after all this there were few things a lil different ..the balling pace was slower, fixing and fidgeting with hair all the time, clapping hands and saying "Nicely done GIRLS". All in all the aussies had to make 235 to win and now they had 29 runs to make in the last over. Goswami, Indian captain had beautifully bowled her 10 overs. I really liked her. The bowling was fantastic..since that's the only part I watched. I saw this known face in the Indian team stand. Gauri Naik .. the girl I admired when I was kid. As a kid we shared a common love for cricket. I used to watch gauri practice all day. I had even once accompanied sanjay dada, her elder brother to pick gauri up from her practice. She was this tom-boy girl who rode an enticer and smiled and asked me what I am doing these days every time I met her. It was great to see her there. She didn't play that match for reasons unknown. Anyway coming back to how Indian chicks beat Aussies ass. We won! We won by 16 runs! A wonderful victory and proud women shaking hands and smiling away. They got to the semi finals with New Zealand and will probably face England in the finals. The woman of the match was Anjum Chopra who supposedly had batted wonderfully. She came to the stand and thanked her team and I could not have been more proud for us women. Is this the future of cricket if I dare ask in this man's game?

p.s. You go girls. ....

aspiring bats-woman
parab

Sorry.. here I said it .. its easy.

Sorry... its got a ring to it ... Sorry.. so how magical is this word ? Magical enough to mend a broken heart .. magical enough to recover failed relationships ... magical enough to make a relation work ...and in my case I was hoping it was magical enough to save my friendship. Turns out its not good enough. When things go wrong and you feel the sense of regret, something within you tells you that you were wrong, you were totally outta line and its time you apologize. However big our ego is, we know deep within that we were a part of the swearing and name calling conversation and we might as well accept we were wrong rather than things getting outta hand. These topics are really sensitive sometimes .. they need to be handled with utmost care, intelligence and timing. If you plan to take the high road when the person has put their foot down ... is it right ? Is it right to compromise when your really hoping its gonna be appreciated. It wasn't. It wasn't appreciated at all ... it was actually being laughed at in public which made things worse. The very fact that you were hoping it be appreciated .. do you really think you were sorry enough. I still stand to ask this ... What do you do when he/she doesn't accept his/her mistake? Would you call it 'being naive' or 'being an egoist' or probably think the situation wasn't awful enough for them, to make them realize that its wrong. You know .. saying sorry is one thing. ... meaning it is another and not accepting it, now that's just uncool, unacceptable and certainly not welcome.

Keep Them Seperate

You're Eating gum ... the flavor just started to get a lil old and someone offers you that sinful dark chocolate Hershey and all you can think of is to 'hide the gum' in some corner of your mouth and enjoy the taste of chocolate. Suddenly you find yourself chewing something at the same time .. and that's when you realize you gotta either spit da gum out or live with it coz you got it all mixed up. What do you do ? Friends are like gum's and chocolates .. you have your set of old friends who you defend, da ones your possessive of and the set of new friends, who your best friend just introduced you to. You know for a fact that in a group, the buddies you choose to hang out with .. know you and love you for what you are so your kinda like their 'Queen Bee' with those extra qualities that they are oh so fond of...yada yada yada.. On the other hand .. your best friend is the 'Queen Bee' of her swarm. So what happens when there are two highly strong sentimental and proud egoist queens trying to make a position to lead the large swarm as a whole? Disaster! There is that 'one' who wants to step down without letting the other one think she won it. But how do you do that ... I dunno, go figure. Some of the mid life crisis situation I'm facing currently. Its just making me feel so bad that I am very very close to renouncing my title 'Queen J in da house' . And it all started with a mockery over writing a blog on a Saturday...turns out it is Saturday.. isn't it ironic.. don't you think.'

Former Queen Bee
Me

We are what we are, Are we?

Chicks Chicks Chicks .. out of all kinds ..the confused , the pretty , the dumb , the independent , the smart .. the bold, the boyish kinds ... there is one genre which spans over all the other .. "The Bitch". She is the one who knows it all . She knows when he likes her .. she knows when he needs her .. she knows when he absolutely loves her and she knows when he'll do anything for her. So the question is why does she act so innocent and stupid all the time ? He is probably under the notion that he is making her fall in love with him ... but what the poor little dog doesn't know is that she is the one pulling the strings. She is the one messing up his head, heart and his life. She is pretending when she says "I don't know why you would think I liked you"..she's pretending when she says "Don't be so nice to me all the time.." and definitely pretending when she says "you soooo understand me" coz she knows for sure he is head over heels ..truly madly deeply in love and would fulfil any unrealistic want when asked for! All we girls need is a little bit a attention ..let me not generalize .. some of us need a hell lotta attention.I agree I am girl and I am probably pissing off a lotta others my kind. But my point here is .. Playing with hearts has become our strength which some of us are really proud of. But should we consider ourselves stronger than men coz we can get them where we want ? We can manipulate them, tease them, mess them up and throw them when done. Is that what we stand for ? I want to turn this around. Its hard for me not to believe I can get any guy I really want..but the method is just very unethical.

Signed
A proud Woman

The Big V

De day, the symbol of "Martyrdom"... no really it really started of as a day for the martyr ... little that they know, that centuries later people will actually keep up the spirit and swear to die for love and succumb to martyrdom. Anyway being a hopeless romantic how can I let go of an opportunity like this to make this day worth dying for. You'll be surprised to know I had a date for de day ... two weeks prior which I declined. And the day arrived and I had nothing special planned for myself. I mean I really didn't feel the need to. It started of as an "Voluntary trip to office" ...and followed by a single lunch at Sweet Chariot. I met her in the evening .. hoping it would be just a girls day out. Coz the last thing I needed was a guy I would need to be nice and cute for ! but he came along with her and it turned out to be kinda cool coz he is equally sarcastic as I am. Though I think there is something cooking between them :). We were at brigade road..one should have seen da place .. there were protests, police and swarms of people all decked up .. walking in pairs and intertwined hands. I don't detest it ..its just a lil too much love for me.. you know like to the extreme, like in hindi movies where the girl goes against her parents and the father hires da villain to kill the hero and there is police and everything. But I like it subtle and less loud coz if you need to dress it up like that it just seems untrue. Well the night was spent in watching mushy movies .. sweet home alabama, pretty women, serendipity .. only to reassure myself that when people come together, they stay together.. they come home to each other every night .. even if I sleep alone I wanna know all of it is true.

Matching Matching

What factor decides that clothes match ... why cant brown shoes go with a blue top ?? Look at it .. they just feel wrong together. Something like he dating her Or Halwa with ice-cream (which does taste good by the way!!). Who said that black and white are universal colors. I mean graphically speaking its true that they have the min and max RGB values and variations in them coz zillions colors ...but seriously why do I always have to buy a black pair of flats and think to myself ... ah yes it'll go with everything. How did I come to that conclusion !! I know for a fact that I still wouldn't get out there wearing something that doesn't match .. coz I have totally submitted to this feeling of discomfort if I'd do otherwise .. but do we need to change the way we think ? Am I incapable of thinking out of the box even when I know for sure that there is something out there ? I feel a lil orthodox and stupid. I mean, as long as it doesn't harm anyone right, except my poor brown shoes feel a lil lonely on the days I wear blue, red and grey!

Signed
Brown shoes Woman

This isnt Goodbye

Dear Mr.Broken Heart,

"I want love that is impossible..a man like me so irresponsible" in words of elton john.. my fav video with robert downey jr...though the song is kinda about drug abuse .. but that's beside the point .. So are u greedy for love? Are you willing to take chances .. are you ready to risk ? How badly do you really want it.. do you feel alone even when your surrounded by people .. or rather you wanna be left alone coz you wanna know , that you still have it in you to wanna be with someone and give it your all. I love to love .. I love to be happy and I love the fact I can use the word love and not get sick of it. Oh yes I do live in my fairy tale world but its not always that bright and colorful you know. To make something perfect you need time , patience and courage. I have all of that but just the one I love is not here with me. When you have to say "goodbye" to something you hold oh so dearly .. how hard is it for you? How hard is it to know that your gonna be miserable for time to come and that you need to start over or may be settle for something less! Now imagine doing it a hundred times and knowing that its killing you inside but you still have to put on a happy face coz people just don't wanna let you be. Yes, it happened to me ...a thousand goodbyes of the thing I love the most and sometimes when I sit alone in my room, I can still hear him, the 'Strums' ring tone of my Apple IPhone ring in my head. tanatanating tanatanatanating ...

goodbye Siemens c25, goodbye Nokia 8250 , goodbye Nokia 6100 , its not goodbye for you my dear, my Apple IPhone
I miss you and remember that I will love you forever.

Yours,
Jopo