My Very Own Ball Drop

It's time to thank all the people, places and times that has made this year amazing. What a way to end the year... than letting my hair down and going partying with my gals. I am the epitome of paranoia when it comes to going to clubs. I need the right people... the right setting and a perfect plan. But today I have never felt so free and senseless.. at the same time holding my ground. I am so afraid of being judged and being uptight ...that it makes me lose out on all the fun I could have had.

Today.. I have reached a new level and not just coz I danced on the table. Who knew people actually party in the empire state building. To me it's not just a tall building anymore. Quote: A rapper rapped a song for us. And this party was just the tip of the iceberg. Yes ..I am in love with New York. Any other place just wont do it. This year has really been eventful. A family vacation.. graduation.. job..my car.. I wonder ..a year is such a short time for all this to happen all at once.

How do I top this? To me the ball dropping event is over already. Isn't 2012 like the end of the world or something. I really don't care right now. I feel high ... higher than the empire state.. and this feeling is a good feeling. It's not just a new year .. it is the memories of the past and anticipation of the new things to come. A Happy New Year to you all. ooo I love my life.

Exhilarated,

Me

Near Death Experience

Yes, this was really a near death experience. Oh no ..not for me... for my baby. Scary right. Well as much as it looks totally outta control, no one got hurt. I can say that coz this happened an hour ago and I am in one piece writing this blog. So the story goes like this..

Three nicely parked cars, sitting right there newly serviced at Firestone. And suddenly people start rushing out. The black honda ran into two cars pushing it towards my bimmer. Yeah it was that close. So the person in the black honda sit's there for a minute doing nothing and people rushing towards him and he starts having a seizure. The owners of the silver civic were just getting into their car right before the car crash. Phew. We were standing on the nicer side of the glass praying that nothing happened to the person and my car. Within 3 minutes, the ambulance, police, paramedics came and gathered around. Luckily the man survived but the damage was crazy. I think firestone's insurance company probably paid for all that. But still for that second my heart was in my mouth.

Imagine my baby looking at that car coming towards it... and couldn't move. It must have felt so helpless. The policeman looks at me and says.. you are so lucky... and I said... yeah I know right! Thanks to my friend Mr.Patel for parking the car inches away. :) Though I don't stop bugging him to drive slow. I think he'll probably have an accident because of it. Ok it's a well known fact that I've been lucky in the past. I sorta have close connections with God you see. But this time it felt like more of a warning than being plain luck.

p.s. Mr.Patel if you are listening.... I said warning. :p

Unhealed Survivor

Me

Pretty Picture

Imagine this, given a board and a pencil, you were asked to draw a scenery in 3 mins. No restrictions on what to draw. What are the chances that your scenery will probably have trees, sun, birds, clouds..may be a house, a river and in case you feel rich you might go for a car. I'd say 100 percent.

Earlier, I had never stopped to wonder why all my clouds have that same bubble like shapes and my house is always drawn with a slanting roof and the trees, what can I say...they always look like they are in their best years. The picture always looks like a quiet, serene place on a bright shiny day. Especially a smiling sun with evenly streaked rays. I find it intriguing. Such is mystery of our daunting lives. Even though this dream is far away from the reality, we always paint a pretty picture. It's funny isn't it.

In reality, the clouds don't have that perfect shape... the houses are smaller and the river is miles away... the birds have probably migrated and the leaves have fallen...you can't really look in the eye of the bright and shiny sun. You wonder... so what's the big idea. My point is that we are always inclined to draw something positive. Unless we aren't really twisted, we always strive to paint a pretty picture.

Clique Artist,

Me

P.S She drew this picture... but if I'd have to draw it.. it would look just like this.

Change is Constant

It's not just the naked trees that are feeling the change in the wind. The trees are losing it's defenses .. so have I. This week has been really eventful. At this very moment, there is silence.. but it's the one before the storm. Finally my ship is going to go through a test of time.. and I can't wait for this journey to begin. I admit I'm not completely equipped but I'm taking it one day at a time.

Built for the Sea,

Me

Off the list

Out of stuff I have on my list of things to do, one of them was going to the cinemas to watch a movie by myself. At this point in my job search, I see everything as an opportunity. Similarly, I have two hours of wait time for a ride back home, my brother suggests I watch a movie and I promptly act on it.

I went to the counter all nervous... asking her. How long is the movie Boots ? She says 1.5 hour... perfect. I go on to explaining why I am going to the movie alone yada yada yada... I'm sure she thought why is she telling me all this. Instead she said. wow puss in boots... a nice selection. I promise you wont get bored... it's got some adult jokes.

I know going to a movie alone is weird... but going to a movie with just you in the hall...what are the chances. This is just the word alone in it's entirety. Well, I didn't mind it much. I liked the movie. It's animated..It's funny...it has cat fights (literally)... and importantly it has a rodeo cat with an accent. It can't get better.

Reached a new level of personal growth,

yup... that's me

Weather Girl

Yeah I watched Weather Girl yesterday, but this post is not about the movie. It's something I need to change about myself. It is something simple, it doesn't take any time at all but it can save me a whole lot of trouble. Guess what that is... Watching the weather channel.

Today as I was walking on the side of the road, I saw girls carrying long fancy umbrellas. Well, girls do that sometimes..so I didn't read too much into it. It was bright and sunny, so I smirked and said to myself..what is wrong with these people. I know right. Sadly, right now I am stuck at schine, eating late lunch, gazing through the window and telling myself again why the hell didn't I carry an umbrella.

I blame cuse really. The locals here say, if you want the weather to change, just wait a day. Amen brother. This time of the year is weird. It's neither snowing nor sunny.. It is somewhere in between and not in a good way. It's frustrating to step out of the door in an outfit totally inappropriate for the weather conditions. Hence, I say it again, I need to watch the weather channel.

The nature is playing tricks on us. Following are the series of events that took place:-

sunny (in the bus) -> hail (waiting for connecting bus) -> sunny (walking to office) -> hail (walking to the diner)-> sunny (walking back), in the matter of three hours. I rest my case.

Janhavi breaks into a song ... Everywhere you go... always take the weather with you....lalalalala... lalal ...

This is me signing off,

Have a bright and shiny day.. people of New York.

Hambo

It's been a while since we used kinect. The reason being we lost our TV at the mercy of my nephew. That sweet little thing didn't even know that he was creating a hole in our hearts. Yeah that is how important TV was for us. And now the hole is filled up with a new TV.

Anyhoo.. yesterday I felt like dancing in the middle of the night. So I did just that. I think the time lag is having a weird effect on me. I sleep at weird hours and am awake through the night. I think dancing is the best thing that happened to me. I mean I don't know where it comes from. No one in my family is known to be remotely into dancing ... or they just haven't got out of the closet. I ain't complaining.

One of the things I regret is to quit my professional dance lessons. The only memory I have of that is moving forward with tapping steps in a straight line without looking down. And the dance teacher looking at me in awe. It's hard to admit but the reason I left dancing is because I couldn't find a holy song for my finale. I was so scared to show up for the next class without a song. Silly eh. Looking back at it now I feel like a sore loser. I gave a really stupid reason to get out of it. I wish I would have had the courage to show up and face the consequences. I really love dancing. How else do you think I can make it through watching all seasons of Dance India Dance.

So right now my ultimate goal is to reach rank 1 in Dance central. I've currently made it to 6 and there is a long way to go. Yes I know I'm bragging. But there are very few things I can be proud of. And dancing would be one of them. :)

Right now I was listening to this song called "Hambo pa laven" by Knife River Cowboys. And it made me dig into the meaning of Hambo. To my surprise, I found out that it's actually a traditional dance in sweden. Now ain't that sweet. It looks complicated in it's own way. It kinda reminded me of that tom and jerry episode Crambone (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uOwhrCkMiKA&feature=related). I don't think they are related but if you see any resemblance... then we are on the same page. If you don't then you are way smarter.

Crambone,

Me

p.s. Link to the song : http://www.thesixtyone.com/#/s/O6Auq3B89lO/

I'm no SpongeBob

Despite my unbelievable matching characteristics to Mr. Sponge bob... I secretly aspire to be like someone else. And who you might wonder. It's none other than Garfield. OMG where should I begin. Don't get me wrong it's not my goal to become a fat lazy cat. I just find him hilarious. He has a great sense of humor. I think Jim Davis did a great job. Garfield might be fat, lazy, selfish. But his sarcasm just beats all. My love for this cartoon may also be coz I try to be sarcastic. Not sure how well I do at it. But as per her, at least I do it at the right time. :)

Anyhoo I like garfield and odie. I wonder if I would have had a dog and a cat and they were great friends. But, cats can be so impersonal at times. They are so independent that it makes me feel inadequate. Dogs on the other hand are so dependent... and it gives me the feeling of nurturing someone.. truly taking care of them. If ya know what I mean.

Switching back to Garfield.. of course I have his comic scripts.. nearly all of them. :). The best part is that he is himself. He doesn't worry about other people or animals. He can be himself and say things that he truly feels.. however inappropriate they are. No pretend ..no non sense. I like that. Long Live Garfield. And hoping for more sequels.

Cartoon Lover,

Me

Quotes from Garfield:

If you are patient, and wait long enough, nothing will happen.

Odie, let's talk effort versus return here. You know, you can still lead a pointless life without all that running around

Why don't YOU watch where I'm going?

Good Times are ahead or behind.. but they sure aren't here.

In search of a study partner

Things are getting pretty hectic. And my motivation has sorta been drifting like a boat. The troubled waters lie ahead and ahoy here I am. All I need right now is a perfect study partner. Someone who doesn't talk to me.. just sits there in front of me and studies. How hard is that right! We can have lunch and dinner together. We can have a bit of small talk only if necessary. But mostly is completely dedicated to studying. I had asked her to get a laptop so that we can study together, but instead she got a boyfriend. So now she has a captain for her love boat and I am sitting there in the middle of the sea trying to survive.

I miss my ex study partner. It's not everyday you find someone who doesn't talk to you, has an exact same schedule as yours and has shit loads of work to barely have any time for small talk. But graduation is a killer!

Hopefully this time will pass really fast and I'll be at shore.

till then, argh argh

me

The day the name Tarzan stuck to me

ok I am telling you ... all my life I have wished to carry off a hair cut like natalie raitano's in V.I.P. Yes I watched V.I.P when I was in school..Aren't you happy I didn't aspire to get a vallery irons look. So I made my mommy to take me to our regular hair dresser and the lady asked me how short I wanted my hair. STOP right here. It's like that pause in a movie where u wish you could come back to and change your decision.

Well I said I want the hair really short. Obviously she thought she knew better than me. And she gave me a mushroom cut instead. I thought I looked horrible. So I come home trying to hide face and I cry. Then I get an idea. Why not I get it cut realllllly short just like natalie raitano. :) (ting.. light bulb over my head.) So I do just that. I go back to the lady and tell her to cut it realllllly short. And obviously there is a little look that she gives me and finally I come home with a really short hair cut. That should make me feel great right! Nope not at all. How can I not realize that my hair is gonna grow and look like a mushroom hair cut anyway. I just added 2 weeks of misery.

That evening my mommy was going to Dadar and I know that you get these wigs there. So I beg her to get me one of those. I did I'm not kidding. I had school on Monday and I could not show up looking like this.

There is a another story to that day that I attended school but not important right now. Just to remind myself it is boycut -> Science -> teacher -> 2nd Oct.

Yeah My mom was back and I didn't see no wigs. Looking back at it now.. wearing a wig would have made me the laughing stock instead. But I had to go to play..how can I miss that. So I enter the terrace and all the boys and girls in my building go... hahaha where is your tarzan hair. I laughed it off..like I always do. And this is how the name got stuck to me. One good thing that came out of it is my wish of having a boy cut became non existent.

signed

The dead natalie raitano in me.

p.s. I think it was probably her crazy fighting skills that got my attention. I was hoping a hair cut like hers ..would contribute to acquire those skills. :p Crazy I sound.

100th Post

Too much pressure. ah.. feels like I'm completing 100 years of writing. Give me a break ..I rose against all odds of nothingness in my life. ahem well I guess its nothing so phenomenal.

In the last month that I was away not writing... I was busy thinking about it. So firstly I wanna start by saying that I love my room. It is only recently that we bought new furniture and due to unavailability of space in our miniature house, stuff was shifted in my room too. Now I cant just let it lay there, I had to rearrange things. And voila we have a nicely decorated room. I finally have a jewelry box. Thank God. And a nice way to stack my unbelievable number of footwear. I know right.

Ok I may show off by saying I know how to play garba or dandiya etc etc ... I'm from mumbai..I am expected to know how to. But to tell you the truth, the only time I've held a pair of dandiya was in a lame dance we did in 6th std. Yet I have the nerve to claim otherwise. I am not really sure how well I can bring it..but hey .. if your hands and head is in place by the end of it.. then I say you did a good job. Surprisingly my brother plays well. That I did not know about him.

I am planning to keep days, that I don't eat non vegetarian food. I am not too big on it anyway .. but still have to have one day of controlling temptation. And today was the first day I failed at it. :)

Hello..change of blog name in case anyone noticed. Turns out Eternal Sunshine Of the Spotless Mind didn't sound like me at all. When asked I could not justify why. Cannot believe it took me 99 posts to realize that. So here... title that makes more sense to me and hopefully to all.

Special Autograph Signature,

100TH post blogger.. ME.

Geekology

This is it. Last Semester. It feels like yesterday when four of us met over lunch just to decide what classes we were gonna take. This is my first week of classes. It is only this week you can pick and choose the classes you are going to stick with for the rest of the semester. It's a pain coz you need to be very careful. If you miss you the opportunity, you can mess up your graduation plan.

I don't regret leaving the corporate world. I know I'll be back in it..in no time. But getting my Masters degree was the best decision I've ever made. This blog is not about that. It's about what I did today that makes me so happy.

The first day of the semester, I came in as a Computer Science Major. Listening to the different options I had in this degree I freaked about this particular course called Principles Of Operating Systems. It wasn't the course that freaked me out really... it was the pre test that allows me to take the course or not. I thought to myself, I know for a fact I want to take classes which were available as a Computer Engineering Major, so why go through this trauma. The next minute I changed my major. I still think it was a good decision. But, that guilt of freaking out about this test made me feel like a failure. But, today .... yes yes ..I'll get to the point. Today is the day I gave that pre-test. I studied for it.. well kinda. But I did. May be the fact that I dont have to do that whole course, I was relaxed while writing the paper. But it felt awesome. I felt so happy.

Ok ok all that is fine, but how do you go to the professor and tell him, listen up yo. .. this is my answer sheet. Please grade it and email me the answers. :p Turns out ... he was more than happy to do it. Initially he looked astonished by the fact that some fool would take tests for fun. But he doesnt know what it meant to me.

Also, today is the day I got offered a teaching assistant ship. Friggin awesome ain't it. I always wanted to be that.. I considered TA's as really smart people. So transitivity rules. . All in all... the stars are changing.

Signed,

Geek in me

p.s. also I dropped my favorite pendant and it was sitting there in the same place I left it. What are the chances. Hopefully good days are here to stay.

I've lost love that was impossible

I'm out of da-nile . Now I'm certain I've lost you. I waited and waited ..I've lost my patience. I thought we were gonna be together. Certainly not for ever...coz this was getting old. But I took good care of us. Yes I did. Four years was a long time right. And you went away..just like that. I didn't even realize. If only I knew that this was the last time I'd see you.. we could have had a proper goodbye. Every time I hear a phone ringing with our song... I think of you. But, now you are gone and you've taken all my memories with it. I wish I could take a backup .. yeah like save all those memories. But no.. you couldn't let me have that could you. I cannot believe just the day before, I thought I achieved a level in our relationship. Now, I cant even claim that we were there, you disappeared.

I hope you are in better hands now. Hope you've moved on. Hope she takes better care of you... or whoever it is that fancies you. Because of you I fought with my family... because of you I lost a dear friend. I can play the blame game all day. I hate you.. But I love you in brackets.

We both know you had to go someday. May be this happened for the best. The strums ringtone is out of my head now... tanatanatanatang .. is that how it sounds. I can move onto a new model. You always knew I had a thing for droid. It lets me install my apps.. faster than you. Goodbye Apple IPhone.. or as you were rightly known .. JIPhone. Hello Android. :)

p.s. Just a day before I lost my phone.. I finished the game of Angry birds with nearly 245 levels. Even before I could boast I did it. It was gone. And then there is ..contacts.. photos..messages. Talk about losing it all eh.

IPhoneless,

Me

Wow a month passed by...without blabbering on the internet

Here I am ... blogging again. So much to write .. so much time too...yet trying to compartmentalize ...fitting things to do at the right time. Now I'm just blabbering. It just helps me establish the fact that I am not mute but mostly it's a little annoying. It's sad that I can switch topics or talk about single most unimportant thing for the longest time or just tell stories and take forever to finish. I can also be straight to the point but only if the situation demands.
Fine I'll stop. We went to Disney World... yay. They say you haveta do it once in a lifetime ... well I plan to do it once in a lifetime only. And you wonder why ... it's so freaking expensive..thats why! But the time I had with my family was precious. It's not everyday that four generations of your family can have a successful trip together. It was great. Well, my dad sponsored the whole thing so I shouldn't be cribbing about the expenses. He worked on his impulse and presented himself all the way here from India.. in a matter of weeks.
So for now that is pretty much it, working hard at work ... making things happen. I like it. I have full control and I am gonna make the best of it..
Before I forget to put this down, I learned to do the hula hoop thingy! It took a while at first but I was a pro in a day. Thank you YouTube for helping me learn so many exciting things..some idiotic but some that saved me a lotta time and money.

hula hula toodles,
me

p.s. note to myself for future reference: you can hula hoop so go grab one..like now.

Forgiveness

Life is too short to hold grudges. I do not know of such anger that can consume me to an extent that it's impossible to have control. But I know it exists, only if you push the right buttons. Every holy book speaks of forgiveness, it does not come easy. To err is human, to forgive is divine .. am I right or am I right. :)
Even if you build up the courage to forgive someone, forgetting will only come with time. So give yourself credit to be able to let go of anger and that is when you start healing. I see forgiveness as my strength. I believe in doing good. But one thing I regret is working on an impulse. Sometimes in life you hurt people and in return you get hurt. But life goes on. We are all adults here.
Jesus asked for God's forgiveness of those who crucified him. "And Jesus said, 'Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.'" OK no ones asking you to do that. But little things that break relations and to top it all the overflowing ego, we don't need such bitterness in our lives. Hell, I need to take extra efforts to not talk to someone. Trust me it's the hardest.
I am no angel, but I try to be a better person everyday. <Janhavi breaks in to a song> Shiny happy people laughing...by REM.

one with good conscience,
me

Happy thoughts make happy people. Don't let people get to you.

Ally Mcbeal

Did you ever have a day in a week that you knew is gonna be good for you? Every wednesday was my day. I used to love wednesdays... obviously it was all in my head. But those days, I used to think I'm Ally Mcbeal. I could relate to her. Things have probably changed now.
Yesterday I watched it again.... like the whole thing. I really wish they had more seasons. I wanted to know who she would end up with. But that's not the point I want to make. She said so many things that hit me somewhere deep. I tell you these writers are so awesome.
Here is what she said, "The real fools are the ones too practical for their own happiness". Things that make you happy are not necessarily the ideal things to do. As long as you are not strangling anyone.. you can go ahead and be happy. Right.
If you've not watched the series... at least take the time to see the quotes from it. Not sure if it will still make sense to anyone who hasn't watched it. But it's worth a try.

Eccentric,
me

some more quotes:

Ally: I've been dumped before, Renee. This isn't pain I'm feeling, it's nostalgia.

Renee: Snow White. Cinderella. All about gettin' a guy. Being saved by the guy. Today it's the Little Mermaid, Aladdin, Pocahontas. All about gettin' a guy.
Ally: So basically we're screwed up because of...
Renee: Disney.

p.s. Suits is this new series that has started. Again..its about lawyers and it's friggin awesome. A good watch.